17-13 days

Less than two weeks!

In my mind, I’m trying to tell myself that this is all going down next weekend. I want to get stuff done this week, so there’s not a million things next weekend. Also, need to be sure to sleep-totally nervous about getting sick…

The past few days have been BUSY. The week was mostly work + planning e-mails and calls. Wednesday night, David finished the dresser-hooray!-and our apartment is one step closer to liveable. We had a Blue Apron order, and enjoyed delicious pan seared salmon, Israeli cous-cous and a fava bean relish. Our first home cooked meal in the new apartment!

Thursday night I met up with my friend Jenn from college at a bar near work. It was great to see her and catch up-it’s been years. It will be interesting getting used to a new happy hour scene. I didnt go to HH all the time, but I did get so comfortable at a few places in DC. The bar we went to on Thursday was really cool (delicious Moscow Mules!), but just new and different.

Explored my first Bay Area farmers market Sunday-the Friday market in Old Oakland. Tons of incredible produce and the pies and baked goods looked heavenly. Can’t wait to try more.

Never did I ever think I would be able to make ramen, but thanks to Blue Apron, made it for dinner Friday. First time cooking with garlic scapes and the combination with spicy ginger, spicy arugula, lemon and soft boiled eggs in a veggie broth-verrrry good.

David and I spent the rest of the night on wedding tasks-only two more weekends to get stuff done…

And certainly took care of a lot this weekend. Flew down early Saturday morning. I don’t ever want to forget how psychologically thrilling it was waking up Saturday morning, knowing I was going home, and home was just an hour flight away. I’ve literally never experienced that before-an hour flight from one home to another-and I never want to take it for granted. It is just awesome.

Took care of a lot of errands and in-person meetings in this short trip. The highlight-sneaking in a quick breakfast with my mom at the Fairmount before a day packed with tasks. It was nice to have a few quiet moments to just catch up. And then, just before getting on the plane tonight, Mom, Dad, Abu and I had a rapid-fire wine tasting before I left for the airport. Most of the wines were really terrible, but I think we found a few good ones. The rest will be perfect for buckets of sangria :)

Still lots to do-I fly back in a few day for one last trip-but made a good dent in the down-to-the-wire tasks!

23-18 days

Incredible that there’s less than three weeks till the wedding. Getting really excited!

Lots going on in the last few days. Getting used to work, exploring the neighborhood and a quick Saturday trip to the beach.

In the last few days…

Explored Sacramento and went to a few meetings. Met up with Eric and Molly for dinner at Hock Farms. It was delicious and so fun to walk over to a bar to meet up with friends after work on a Friday.

Caught up on wedding + apartment to-dos on Saturday and explored Point Reyes:

We had an awesome picnic and just soaked up the excitement of being outside, by the water and not packing. Felt great to feel the wind and sun.

Caught up with our awesome friends, Alex and Rebecca on Sunday. It was neat to start the day having breakfast with friends in Stockholm. Budak took a screenshot of the moment G chat froze on us-ha!

Mr. Bress-friend/officiant extradordinaire-came over and we watched the USA game at a local bar:

So, so excited for him to lead our ceremony and to MARRY us. In just a few days!!

But now, bedtime for bonzo.

27-24 days

Is that right? 24 days until the wedding? Unreal.

Equally unreal-I live in California now. Feeling so completely foreign and new in the state where you grew up and lived for 22 years is-likely an experience unique to a Californian.

Since I’ve been an Oakland resident for all of four days, hesitant to make any generalizations about what this means or what it’s like here-all I know is that it’s new. And different. I certainly don’t feel like I’ve moved home-this is a completely new place.

However, unlike the last time I moved across the country, I don’t have that haunting, terrifying sense of total loneliness. When I moved to Baltimore, I felt completely alone-like I had to do everything and figure everything out. Which was basically true.

This time around, I’m astounded at how different the change is psychologically. Not being alone, having David here, makes the whole thing completely different. And the fact that his family is close by and my parents are drivable just puts everything into a completely different mindset.

It doesn’t mean that this isn’t a lot-it just doesn’t feel insurmountable. It’s been intense-when David met me at baggage claim, I just wanted to collapse. The feeling of exhaustion is wearing off, but still having the new-kid-in-school moments. Just trying to be patient with everything and take everything slowly.

One thing I do know-I don’t ever want to take this weather for granted. It is gorgeous here. Each morning, when I wake up to sunlight! Shining through the widows (byeeee basement apartment!) I remind myself of how awesome that is. Every walk that doesn’t end drenched in sweat feels like such a gift. It’s brutal right now in DC, and I feel a bit obnoxious writing this. But this is just incredible and I don’t ever want to be blasé about it-it’s awesome and I hope I’ll continue to be awed and grateful.

28-30 days

Boston was not on the agenda for the cross country drive, but here I am in Logan waiting for my flight to SFO.

It’s been an intense day and a half. It will be a while to process the emotions of saying goodbye, but for now, just able to reflect on the whirlwind of this move.

David came down with a terrible virus on Wednesday and by Thursday it was clear he could not fly across country. It was also unclear what was going on with him-it was a bad virus. By Thursday night it was clear the drive together was not going to happen as planned. I wish I could say I handled all of this gracefully, but in reality, I fell apart.

By Friday morning, David was home and feeling much better. Thank goodness. Late Thursday night, after a complete meltdown to Janou, I booked a flight home for Saturday night. I just wanted to get to California.

The last 24 hours have been a whirlwind of packing, tossing, shipping, and all over again. The last trip to Goodwill was far from the final stop-two more trips and lots of rearranging followed. Janou has been an absolute saving grace-she stayed over the last two nights, ran around with me on last minute shipping/goodwill errands, and just kept everything light and pleasant.

Of course, everything is totally fine. Thankfully David is fine and that’s what’s most important. Can’t wait to be in Oakland tonight. It felt pretty surreal closing the door to the apartment and driving down the street one last time. I’m not sure how I can keep crying, but driving past Lincoln Park and leaving Eastern Market really did a number.

Haven’t really processed all of that. Just feel tremendously fortunate to have had the time we had in DC/Bmore with incredible friends + family close by. It was a total privilege and I am so grateful.

31 Days

Goodbyes continue. Really hoping to look back on these entries and cringe at how overly dramatic I sound because everything will be totally great-but for now-cant seem to stop being emotional. It doesn’t help that it’s been pouring.

Enjoyed a very nice lunch today with a colleague at Ping Pong Dim Sum. I rarely ever have dim sum and it was delicious. Also went to my last Hill reception. It was really lovely and I was able to see a lot of colleagues and friends.

After what is hopefully the LAST Goodwill run ever, said goodbye to this cutie:

Wonder how big he’ll be the next time I see him! Didn’t even say goodbye to Katie and Dave yet-having dinner with them on Friday-and I still sobbed in the car.

This is a lot, but it’s all good, and in an odd way, it feels really good to just let the emotions happen.

A while ago, my favorite blogger posted something about contemplating a move. I furiously read the hundreds of comments, searching for wisdom and advice on how to cope/thrive with a big change. Saved some of my favorites and I’ve been reading them over and over-they bring great comfort:

Thoughts on moving:
And I expect when we leave here it will be really, really hard again. I have this theory that the more we travel the more of our soul we scatter around. It’s beautiful and expansive feeling, but also terribly bittersweet.

The longer you wait, the more you’ll over analyze and probably talk yourself out of it. I say trust your instinct and do what’s best for your family. you figure it out as you go

I have made a few big moves in my life, and honestly each one seems to get easier

I think that it is weird to NOT move. I have moved on average every 3 years since I was born. So to hear people get all anxious and scared about moving makes me go “Really? Come on now.”

If you’re giving it so much thought, perhaps you need to just DO IT so that you never wonder what would have been :)

What I take from all of this is that as soon as you settle somewhere you develop bonds with the place and people, and there will always be things you miss if you move away. BUT as long as you have great friends and family somewhere nearby or willing to travel, anywhere can be the perfect home :)