Category Archives: Marriage

4 years!

This time four years ago….we were cutting the cake at our reception at UCLA :)

Tonight, I’m struggling to keep my eyes open, looking at a post-dinner high chair, covered in edamame, and already anticipating my Friday morning coffee.

So, basically, living the real, beautiful life that is four years of marriage.

Diego has a cold and last night was rough. He was up most of the night, wailing to be held. David walked with him for hours, until Diego finally…..dozed…off…

Four years ago, when we gathered in the evening sun at Dickson Plaza, and stepped into marriage, felt quite different from tonight. As David and I blearily trudged through the morning today, and traded off half-work days and baby care, doled out Tylenol and rolled on the Oilogic, I had a moment where I thought….”hmmph…some anniversary.”

But really, this was the dream on that warm July evening. This was the exact simple life we hoped for, as we exchanged rings, to wear in love and joy. And, over the last few years, this is what we kept hoping for, in beautiful, happy days, and in very difficult ones, as well. As my favorite, Kelly Corrigan says, in the closing line of Glitter and Glue, THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE GREAT ADVENTURE.

I mean, my goodness, how freaking lucky are we to ring in four years with a whiny baby? To go through these beautiful and exhausting motions and battles of dinner-bath-bottle-bed, together, every night? To fret over the mundane, like did he get enough to eat tonight? Why won’t he just fall asleep in his crib, like every other baby? Must he open the cabinet and take apart the rice cooker every.single.time I make dinner?

Since I started typing this, we watched our wedding video, and I’m energized by those memories. Four years is not that long; hardly a blip on the screen in many marriages. Yet looking at the people in the video, it feels simultaneously like long ago and a recent memory.

When I picked out David’s card, the TJs card selection was pretty slim, so I opted to re-work at wedding card. The cover is a print of wedding shoes and cake, with big words: BEST DAY EVER! It made me smile because, as Mindy Kaling says, our wedding was “a great day, for sure, but not the beginning and certainly not the end of a friendship with a person you can’t wait to talk about gardening with for the next forty years.”

It was a beautiful day. But the best part is that it started the next chapter, the new adventure of life in marriage. In our wedding video, my mom commented that I told her how much I look forward to coming home from work, because I can’t wait to see David, and talk at the end of the day. We don’t talk about gardening, but four plus years later, the sentiment still stands. I love the end of the day, when everything is finally quiet, and we talk.

So, I guess yes, some anniversary! Grateful for that beautiful day four years ago, and all the best days ever and hard days, and everything in between, past, present and future.


Filed under Marriage


Three years ago today, we were waking up, nice and hungover (oops), and getting ready to get MARRIED!

Like birthdays, anniversaries are really only special to the people celebrating, but they’re kind of more fun because you get to celebrate together. And this year, we get to celebrate with our little Diego-bear!

Looking at the photo above reminds me of something I haven’t thought about in a while. One of our more agonizing wedding decisions was something that should have been so simple-picking a first dance song. We couldn’t think of anything. The songs I associated with our relationship were either wayyy too emotional (hello, John Hiatt) or not really danceable (hello, Coldplay). Also, we’re terrrrrrrrible dancers and needed something we could basically just sway to in front of 150 of our  closest friends.

Anyway, one morning, David e-mailed me this link: I’d never heard the song before, but after listening I was like, YUP! That’s it! (Also, I cried. Of course).

During our wedding, I remember LOVING our first entrance songs (SO FUN) and our last dance. But, at the time, the first dance felt kind of awkward. The sound in the big room felt different than it had on my phone, when I listened to it with just David. I loved the sentiment of the song, but it didn’t perform well.

Listening to it this morning, I starting tearing up. Three years later, its the perfect song for our marriage. A wedding is funny-an incredible moment, but also a very public display. A marriage is so intimate and personal, and a wedding, while clearly personal, can at times feel like a show

Three years later, I remember all the beautiful, personal, moments of the wedding and I treasure how we’ve grown in our marriage. I probably wouldn’t recommend that song, Better, as a song to get a wedding crowd going. But as a song to remember and listen to throughout a marriage? It’s just right. 

Cheers to three years, David. Thankful for you, and all the happy moments, past, present and future. Especially the ones with this guy-you both make everything better :)

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Filed under Marriage, Wedding

Central Coast mini-vacation

Last month, just before Thanksgiving, David and I spent a few days on the Central Coast.  I love Thanksgiving vacations because work is generally quieter that week, making it much easier to quickly relax and enjoy. And it was very relaxing and beautiful.

I worked from home on Monday, and after work, we hit the 5, bound for Cambria. Usually we stop at In-N-Out, but the hotel night came with dinner, so we pushed on to make a later reservation.

When I found out I was pregnant, I’m embarrassed to say my first instinct wasn’t to research baby books, but it was to research and plan a mini-vacation (a babymoon, I guess).  When you’re trying to get pregnant, it’s hard to make travel plans because you have no idea if/when you’ll be mobile. So, it was nice to have some idea of the timeline and begin planning some fun trips. I immediately ruled out anything international, primarily for cost, and I was so exhausted (first trimester) that the thought of a long flight lacked any appeal. All I wanted to do was 1) be near an ocean or pool, 2) not feel pressured to sight see, and 3) sleep, sleep, sleep in a nice hotel. (Again, first trimester). I booked and cancelled hotels in Sedona and San Diego before realizing-hello! Santa Barbara! We loved our honeymoon, we could combine it with our travel to Irvine for Thanksgiving, and it offered everything I wanted.

SB felt a bit far for a post-work drive and I found a great deal for a hotel in Cambria, so we settled on that for the first night.

We stayed at the Cambria Pines Lodge and it was…interesting. The price was right, the grounds were gorgeous, and it included a surprisingly delicious dinner at the restaurant. So no real complaints, but it just wasn’t somewhere I would recommend as a destination-though great for a night while traveling through the coast.

After breakfast, we drove to Cayucos and picked up some super sweet Brown Butter Cookies before driving down to Santa Barbara.

We stopped at The Nook for lunch and I immediately felt that sense of-ahhh, yes, we’re in Southern California. Slightly warmer weather, and just a hint of an ocean breeze. The bar had an incredible selection of beer on tap and a huge fridge with imported bottles.  

With such happy memories of the Fess Parker Santa Barbara, we decided to stay there the next two nights.

Our room faced the ocean (hooray!!) and I camped out on the balcony for much of the next two days, reading Commonwealth.

Later that night, we walked to The Lark for dinner. By far, my favorite meal of the trip. Wish I had the skills and discretion to effectively take a photo of the restaurant, but I don’t, so I’ll just have to remember it. It’s a beautiful wood beamed, brick walled, room and the food matches the stunning decor. A very nice, leaisurly, smallish plates dinner.

The next day, we walked around State Street for a bit and checked out Jeannine’s for brunch. I wondered if it served as the inspiration for Meryl Streep’s bakery in It’s Complicated. It’s thoughtfully decorated, bursting with buttery croissants and pastries, and clearly has a cult following. I would go back, but not order as much. David and I can certainly eat but the portions were large even for us (which is saying a lot).

Later that afternoon, I splurged on a prenatal massage at the hotel. It was really nice. The massage therapist was also a doula, and she placed my hand on my belly at the end of the massage, to rest with the baby. I don’t know why, but I just thought it was so sweet!

It was a bit too cold to fully swim, but I dropped my toes in the water to relax. The rest of the trip was nice and quiet: naps and reading.

Craving cheesy pasta, we decided on Trattoria Vitoria for dinner. Being the night before Thanksgiving, it was packed with families and had a cozy, classic Italian atmosphere. 

The next morning, we watched the Macy’s parade over room service breakfast (vacation is the best). It was nice to be in the US for Thanksgiving! The dance performances in the parade were amazing. Later, I took a long walk along the beach, and it was wonderful seeing all the families out, biking and walking along the water before their Thanksgiving dinners. Once again, I felt very grateful for the jaw dropping natural beauty of the California coast.

The best part was saying goodbye to vacation only to turnaround and head to Irvine for Thanskgiving dinner. This is this last big getaway David and I will take, just the two of us, for a while, and I’m so thankful we got to spend some time soaking up some sun and quiet time such a pretty place.

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Filed under Marriage, Travel

Looking forward to March 

It’s a super crisp, foggy, fall morning and I’m thinking about things to look forward to. I’m in DC this week, and next week we’ll road trip to Irvine to Thanksgiving, and before you know it, it’s the holiday season, New Years, and then… spring. I’m so looking forward to spring. This year should be particularly exciting as David and I will be getting to know our first child!

I’m 23 weeks pregnant with a baby boy :) 

I keep thinking about him and chatting with him and dreaming about getting to know him in the future. Feeling incredibly grateful and just hoping we do the right thing with this incredible responsibility.

There’s a lot more I look toward to writing about. It’s wild to think we’re halfway there!

I found out on the 4th of July. Time crawwwwled that first trimester. It was so strange to be so excited about something, not be able to tell anyone and feel so LOUSY. Weeks 7-11 were beyond exhausting. Thankfully, the second trimester has been much better energy and appetite-wise. Oddly, I’ve developed an aversion to bacon and avocado, and I crave dairy (lots of ice cream, cheese and smoothies). A few weeks ago, I got the infamous Snoogle pillow for sleeping, and it helped tremendously. We’ll see how I do this week in DC without it!

Recently, one of our friends asked David and me how we feel. I think David summed it up well: 60% excited, 30% nervous, 10% eeek-can we handle this?? Maybe that’s kind of parenting in general? 

Getting used actually feeling pregnant. It helps that I’m showing now-the bump just kind of popped around 18ish weeks. I got nervous about working out during the first trimester-and I just felt terrible-so that’s something I’ve certainly let slide. Still trying to go for long walks and do yoga when I can. 

Also trying to soak up advice and stories from friends about pregnancy, parenting, the whole thing. I love hearing different experiences and hope to keep learning throughout this journey :)

Sending good thoughts for a good Monday and week ahead!

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Filed under Family, Marriage, Pregnancy

Are you there Fall?

As I got in the car this morning, I was surprised to find it was drenched. Did the sprinklers go off? And then I realized, it RAINED!!!! Haven’t started a day this excited in a long time. It looks like it was a total fluke-it’s supposed to be in the mid-90s next week-but for now, I’ll relish this pretend fall.

A few things I’m looking forward to-whenever Fall does decide to arrive:

1) Not sleeping with the air conditioning. 

2) Maybe, maybe seeing some greenery? It’s just so dry everywhere. Hoping we get more rain soon.

3) David’s chili. David’s been making the same incredible chili recipe for YEARS. I’m craving it, but it’s tough to justify it when it’s sweltering. Much better with cooler weather.

4) Fall leaves. Hoping to see pretty leaf changes in Stockton and looking forward to more leaf peeping during some East Coast trips over the next few months.

5) Turtlenecks! And sweaters and scarves and just being comfy and cozy. 

6) Apples? I always find the onslaught of apple picking photos that fill my newfeed every fall a bit amusing. I’m always curious-what is everyone DOING with all those apples? Like, how many pies are actually being made? Janou and I went to a cute farm in Maryland a few years ago, and it was SO fun spending the day together, but I have no idea what I did with the apples. Now that we’re a much shorter drive to farms and Apple Hill, it might be nice to dive in to the whole fall ritual.

7) Corn maze? Actually no. I have zero interest in corn mazes. BUT-I do remember going to a gorgeous farm in Connecticut when David was living in Hartford. We went for the corn maze and pumpkin picking, yet the best part was pancakes. We sat on the deck and enjoyed hot berry pancakes in the cool fall air. 8 years later, it’s still one of my favorite fall moments. Definitely interested in some pancake/donut tasting at a farm.

8) Canella/night tea. Like chili, it’s tough to justify hot tea on a summer evening, but it’s such a nice way to wind down. A favorite treat-hot water with a cinnamon stick and honey. So soothing.

Looks like we have about 24 hours till it gets hot again-going to try to enjoy this fall teaser :)

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Filed under Holiday, Marriage